“If you think what’s going on all across the U.S. doesn’t have anything to do with what’s going on inside your marriage, you’re dead wrong.” That’s a line from one of my recent Instagram posts about this week’s podcast topic.
So what do racism and systemic racism (AKA white supremacy) have to do with your marriage, exactly? The same systems that are oppressing and killing black men right now, this entire system of white male supremacy, is the exact same system that we are fighting against in dismantling the patriarchy.
And that has everything to do with your marriage. In this episode, I explain how and why in detail.
Here’s the thing: I decided to just turn on the microphone and address these topics head-on. And as a white woman, with my own implicit biases and blind spots, I may have gotten things wrong. And that’s ok. I’m willing to listen and learn and pivot.
I almost didn’t release this episode because I was scared to get it “wrong.” But then I realized that that very thought/feeling was part of my own white fragility. This fear is what silences so many white people, and it’s our silence that has allowed this to go on for as long as it has.
White people need to speak up. We need to be willing to step in it, and when we get called out for getting something “wrong,” we need to say, “Thank you. I hear you,” to those who’ve taken the time to educate us.
We don’t need to be defensive, or work overtime to prove that we’re an “ally.” An ally says “thank you,” and digests what’s been said by the very people we’re purporting to support.
Bottom line: we need to pull this poisonous weed of white supremacy up at its root. Let’s get to work.
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