One of the most life-changing moments I see when I coach people through relationship transitions is when they realize: “I’m not crazy. There’s a pattern.”

Narcissistic behavior isn’t random. It’s painfully predictable. It follows a cycle: love bombing, gaslighting, blame-shifting, and manipulation. The narcissist’s goal? Keep you stuck, confused, and off balance so you doubt your reality.

When we’ve grown up with people-pleasing tendencies or have a history of walking on eggshells, it’s easy to think we’re the problem. But here’s the truth: your biggest strength — your empathy — is exactly what makes you vulnerable to their tactics.

When I work with someone who’s recognizing these patterns, the first thing I encourage is this: name it. Call out the gaslighting. Write down the manipulation. Once you start labeling these tactics, your brain can begin to untangle what’s yours and what never was.

Here’s what I want you to remember: If there’s a playbook for them, there’s a playbook for you too.

You don’t have to keep reacting on autopilot — you can learn to respond on purpose.

One strategy I share is creating emotional and physical distance. That means using clear, written communication — think email instead of texting — so there’s a record. It means documenting conversations. These aren’t “mean” or “petty” moves — they’re protection.

Another key step is understanding that narcissists rarely change, no matter how many chances you give or how clearly you explain your pain. They may promise the moon but they will deliver chaos.

So if you’re recognizing this playbook in your relationship, ask yourself:
✨ What would freedom look like for me?
✨ What parts of my story am I ready to reclaim?
✨ Who do I need on my side to help me break free?

This isn’t just about surviving. It’s about ending the exhausting cycle and building a life where you’re no longer silenced, blamed, or manipulated.

I remind people every day: Your truth is stronger than any tactic used against you. If they’re playing a game to keep you stuck, your new playbook is the roadmap to get you out — and keep you out.

Freedom starts with clarity — and you’re already on your way.

🌱 If you’re ready for step-by-step support, my program Phoenix Rising was created for you. It’s a community of people just like you, learning the strategies and building the confidence to break free — and thrive.

You don’t have to do this alone. Learn more here and let’s rise together.